First Day of Physical Therapy

God stepped into my heart that day and I began to see Julian different. As I stood up from the alter and began to walk back to my seat I saw him looking for me as he sat in daddy's lap. He was stretching his neck trying to see above the adults in front of him and as I made eye contact with him he smiled his big smile and reached for me....I melted. It was the first time he reached for me instead of me reaching for him. When I picked him up I gave him a huge hug and as I pulled him back to look into his eyes...he threw up all over me. There I stood in my Sunday's best ready to share my mommy moment with my son and I was covered in puke....but I didn't care...for the first time since we brought him home I didn't care that he threw up on me.

We took Julian to his first physical therapy appointment that same week I had cried with God. I was still feeling overwhelmed as a new mother but my heart was back to feeling like Julian's mother. I was anxious to hear what needed to happen to help Julian with his movements. He was still not trying to move on his own other than to reach for my husband or I and he would also hold a bottle. My bigger concerns were I was given a list of things he should be doing at 5 months old and other than holding a bottle he wasn't doing any of them. At night when I put him to bed he would stay sleeping in the same position, he didn't move around the crib or even roll over he would be in the exact same position I left him in. When we would lay him on his back he would just lay there like a slug without even trying to move. When he was on his tummy he would scream with his face in floor because he didn't even try and lift his own head. So we needed some pointers on how to help him.

When we got to the physical therapist office we were expecting to meet the same woman that did Julian's initial evaluation but instead we were introduced to Denise. She was a young woman with inviting brown eyes and dark brown hair. She was very friendly as she introduced herself to my husband and I. Once the introduction were over she jumped at the chance to meet our cute little Julian. As he laid in the baby carrier she began to talk to him...he gave her no response. She then made funny faces at him and he still just looked at her with his serious dark brown eyes and serious face. He barely made eye contact with her when she was down on the floor with him and if he did accidental make eye contact he then would immediately looked to me for reassurance. She caught on to him quickly and instead ignoring his signals the way Betty Rose did she gave him some space. She escorted us back to the same area we went to for Julian's evaluation just a few weeks prior.

As the three of us walked into the large therapy room I was overwhelmed by the amount of children that were there. The room was full of children and there therapists. There were some children that were laughing and having fun with there therapist and others that were crying or yelling because they didn't like therapy. As I watched the others in the room Denise caught my eye....she smiled her comforting smile and said...we are going to be over there in that corner next to the large mirrors. We made our way over to the corner and I let out a big breath in hopes that the butterflies in my stomach would fly out my mouth.

When we reached the corner of the room Denise said... right here will be just fine..and she pointed to a large blue mat on the floor. It was the kind of mat you would see at a wrestling match and reminded me of a middle school gymnasium. She took her shoes off and sat down thats when I noticed she had Julian's file in her hand. My husband and I took spots on the floor next to her and we began to get Julian out of his carrier for Denise to begin therapy with him. But her first order of business was not to show us how to manipulate his muscles or how to teach him to roll over...instead the first thing she wanted to do was discuss Julian's injuries based on the medical reports she had received and more importantly explaining those injuries to my husband and I.