The Test Kept Coming

As I cried all the way home I was trying to put into words why the tears were even there. And I couldn't, all I could do is cry. I was crying about something that hadn't even happened yet. I was crying at the idea of not being a mother. I was crying over the thought of not being able to give my husband a child, I was lost in broken dreams...and the blood for the very first test had just been drawn. Isn't it funny how we fear the worst before we even know the results. When I got home to tell my husband the outcome, he was as always, my saving grace. When I am flying into my "What If World" he brings be back to earth and just simply says....Lets wait and see what happens. And so we did.

Seven days later the test results were in. My hormone levels were normal. What a huge relief! It was like I had been holding my breath for seven days and now I could finally breath. And as soon as I was breathing again the doctor informed me he wanted to run the next test. The next test was to check to see if I carried an antibody that killed off semen. Can you believe that!?! Here we are trying to bring a child into the world and I could be killing off sperm....GREAT! Now just a warning the next few details aren't for those of you with weak stomachs. But I tell the details for my husband...he brings the humor into the antibody test!

The way you find out if you have an antibody that kills off semen is you wait until the day your ovulating and then you have intercourse. The following morning you run to your doctors office and he takes a sample and lets you know if there are live swimmers. Seems easy enough right....well we waited until ovulation day and then we had AMAZING sex! Okay, to be honest I don't remember the sex but for my husband sake...it was AMAZING! The next day we BOTH..that's the key word there BOTH of us went to see my OBGYN and found ourselves with a story my husband will never forget.

My husband came with me for moral support because at this point every test to me could mean infertility and mental break down. So we get into the room and I am back in the stirrups and my crazy OBGYN is there and he takes a sample. No big deal really, not any worse than my previous visit. My husband sat in a chair by my side with just a side view. Although it was a little awkward we managed...I mean we are married we could handle this! Then the next thing I know my OBGYN is back to Mucus talk, only this time with my husband. I think trying to educate him on the female body however when I looked over at my husband he looked at me like a kid that just found out Santa Claus doesn't exist. He was full of fear and his eyes were the size of saucers. Then out of now where my doctor pulls out his hand and shows my husband my mucus. When my husband tells the story the mucus was 4 feet in length and the doctor couldn't get off his glove. Sounds like a fishing story but oh know we are talking about MY MUCUS! I was mortified and my husband was green. Luckily we made it thru that test without anyone passing out or throwing up. And even better news...I wasn't a sperm killer.

The next few tests were: a test where they ran dye thru my fallopian tubes to see if my they were blocked...they were clear. My husband had his swimmers tested...that came back normal. Every test we took we passed! So why hadn't we gotten pregnant. After about 6 tests and thousands of dollars later the doctor said we may want to go see an infertility specialist...and all we heard was....you may want to look into spending $25,000.00 for in vitro fertilization. And so we took a break from it all for about 6 months. That was our first break from trying to become parents........